Crystal Ball

I wonder if I'll ever have a job where I don't feel like goofing off all the time. Will I ever feel that committed? So committed that I don't just want to do the bare minimum. I've never had a job like that. I've always done what I had to in order to keep up appearances, but I've never really *cared* about what I'm doing.

I like my job - don't get me wrong. As far as jobs go, this one is as good as any I've ever had - better, actually. Still, like with every other job, I'm always trying to find a way out of the stuff I don't want to do.

Will I ever have a job where I actually want to do everything - for a reason other than the paycheck or just to avoid getting fired?

I have often said to myself and others that my dream job is writing freelance - being my own boss. But when I really think about it, I bet I'd put off my own work just as much as I do here. Maybe working 3 days a week or something would be better for me. Maybe I'd feel more motivated to work.... ? Who knows.

Why do I put off writing assignments - when I am a self-professed writer? If it is truly "what I love to do" as I tell everyone it is, then why don't I jump at the chance to do it?

I'm going to make a prediction here:

By the time I'm 35, I bet I'll be looking for a new job, at least part time.

But what? The only thing I can actually see myself loving - without putting it off or trying to avoid it - is baking.

Maybe I really am meant to have my own bakery or cafe or something.

If so, all those years of schooling were certainly time and money well spent.

Back to work.